Abusive discipline uncovered
If your punishments and disciplinary styles are making you feel guilty, you might be using an inappropriate method of parenting.
Discipline can be a tough subject to follow. Every parent has their own idea of how to raise their child in an effective way.
We all want our children to be well-mannered, successful, healthy and happy and being supportive is a fundamental platform to work from. But when parents become overbearing and controlling about aspects of their children’s lives, they may become involved in a form of bullying and adopt this style of discipline, perhaps without even knowing it.
Psychologists say that every bully is also a victim, and that if you feel like a victim, you may be bullying others.
Most people associate bullying with other children or school students. Sometimes, the bullies that cause the most damage are the parents. While tough-love can bring out positive results, a line needs to be drawn when it gets out of hand where parents end up insulting and bringing their children down. After all, discipline means ‘to teach’, not to punish or shame.
Think of the controlling mom of a high-school beauty pageant contestant, or the overzealous dad at an athletics event. Often it is these parents who will degrade and shame their child if a high standard of performance or achievement is not met.
Some cases of bullying may be more severe than others. Being a parent means that you hold the power, but it’s important that you exercise this right positively and that you don’t end up pushing your children too hard to the point of bullying and abuse.
The following video is from one of Dr Phil’s TV shows on ‘Bad Parenting’. It shows to what extent some parents go to when disciplining their children with this controversial, ‘army-style’ approach to parenting.
WARNING: THIS VIDEO MAY OFFEND SENSITIVE VIEWERS:
Where do you draw the line when it comes to discipline?